Iceland

Honestly I am so glad I went here. So glad. I ain't going back. Done Iceland. But I would recommend that anyone go. It's that interesting.

Let's see, we got an airbnb right in the center of Reykjavik (at the end of the rainbow street, Nov 2019). I would definitely rent from these folks again, B14. The house was freaking perfect. Lot's of stairs maybe but the gigantic top floor balcony made it all worth it once you got up there. It was sleek and cool and all of the bedrooms open up to the huge great room and kitchen. It was perfect for us.

Every place you visit is an experience in rights and wrongs. Goods and bads. Do agains and don’t you ever bring that up again you son of a bitch-ings.
Iceland may be the pinnacle of that type of travel. For example:

DONT
Fly Iceland Air.
This is a discount airline that acts like a premium airline and doesn’t even have discount prices. While its planes have seatback entertainment throughout, they are pretty meh beyond that. Service is terrible with seat assignments, upgrades, etc, you get nothing on the plane that you would typically get free flying internationally (like food and booze), the planes are small 757’s and 320’s, the first class section is on par with US domestic flight first (terrible), and overall the perks of a non stop flight just don’t exist. Take the layover in a cool city and fly a decent airline.

Think you’ll see the Northern Lights.
I’m now convinced this is a scam. You’ll notice how little they focus on the northern lights. You’ll notice how they built a humongous planetarium with “guaranteed northern lights viewing” (this place is actually pretty cool with lots of museum like movies and an ice cave), you’ll notice that everyone you talk to says the same thing about the northern lights. They ain’t happening, and if they do, it ain’t gonna be like you think. We saw em. Bright light for a few minutes in the sky. We went on the big grey line tour, packed bus, took forever to get out of town to a giant barren field (but with plenty of bathrooms!), we waited for hours in the freezing wind, we got back on the busses having not seen shit. That tour guarantees you other nights free if you don’t see em, but they cancel it at the drop of a hat (we got canceled thrice). But is that really how I want to spend my entire night in Iceland anyway?!?! No!!!
On night 2 we took a cab out to the Reykjavík lighthouse. Waited for an hour in the freezing freezing freeeeezzzzziinnggg cold and wind. Saw some lights. Got left for dead. Found a way home.
It was liiie the wedding singer...WELL
WWWWHHHOOOPPPPDDIIIIDDDDOOOO!

Eat anything that you’ve heard they eat.
It’s not that you can’t or that I’m somehow turned off by the food. It’s just that it’s so stupid. It’s a gimmick for us stupid heads. I tried the fermented shark. Yes. It came sealed in a container so the entire restaurant didn’t have to smell that disgusting shit. It’s vile, outrageous, foolishness. I’m proud of myself yes, sure, but gagging is not dining, and I happen to really like food.
But that’s not the point.
The point is THEY DONT EAT IT. They don’t eat the silly puffins in a jar, they don’t gorge on reindeer, they don’t stuff themselves with whale, and they don’t dine on fermented dumpster fires. Do sooommmmeee people? Of course. Of course they do. But Iceland is a land of coffee, and breads, and fresh fish, and stews and soups, and hot dogs. Some people eat crazy shit everywhere in the world, but generally they no longer eat like they did 1,000 years ago. Listen to Tyrone Biggums. Yeah I’ve eaten from a dumpster. Of course I have. You know what do food tastes like! Just like it smells! Delicious.

Tip
They don’t have that culture (except in very special circumstances, like the city center tourist coffee shop with the tip bowl...people ain’t stupid ya know). They generally will correct you when you try to tip. It’s a point of pride it seemed.

Most of all, don’t think you can find a deal.
You can’t. No, you can’t.
Iceland is really really expensive. Frustratingly so. It’s not necessarily the money that will bother you, it’s the value, and it’s the price for the same thing you can’t get elsewhere for outrageously less.
Every item in a restaurant is 20 bucks. Except when it’s more.
Beers are crazy expensive, wine too, and cocktails. Plus the food. And transportation. And the tours. And the museum (I was floored at 40 USD pp). And hmmmmm, what else is there.
Singapore is more expensive I would say, crazy expensive, but you can find cheap pockets. You can find local and thus reasonable areas. Not here. Not in Iceland.
That being said, I asked quite a few people, and no one had a second job, they all lived in the city, and they all seemed very happy and would never, ever move. Just driving a cab or working in a store seemed like enough for a decent place and a happy life. So maybe we’re all just dumb assholes.

Do
Get a driver to pick you up from the airport. Arranged taxi is fine. The price is honestly nominally different. It’s expensive no matter what you do and having someone there with a sign to help and direct etc is fantastic.

Stay in the city center.
This is a fun city and it’s very very walkable. If you don’t do this there is no reason to go, unless of course you’re an outdoor freak show type, in which case why are you reading this site?

Get a private tour of the golden circle.
Can’t stress that enough.

Go to the blue lagoon. But don’t eat at their dumbass restaurant!

Go to their themey gimmicky bars.
Sure they have cool bars too with cocktails that you get in the cool bars with the cool cocktails and the things with the stuff. But you can do that anywhere now.
What was more interesting was the big Lebowski bar (don’t spin their asshole totally rigged wheel though), and the chuck Norris Bar, and their kinda small but awesome food hall (which was kinda set up like a beer hall which I loved).
It was funny and cool to see what people come up with when trapped on an island in the middle of the North Atlantic.

Eat a hotdog.
Yes, it’s the same as the other hot dogs you have eaten except they put a bunch of gross shit on top. But now you can say you ate a hot dog in Iceland, and that’s pretty cool.

Hlemmur Food Hall. Great place we got beers and snacks and also where I trekked to Braud.
Don’t forget fermented shark and we were at that place Icelandic Fish and Chips?
Wonders of Iceland with ice cave, awesome movie, planetarium, etc