US - Aspen
First things first, flying into Aspen airport ain’t no joke. Mountains all around you and the airport ain’t so big. Plus, you know what the number one cause of plane crashes is? Hitting a mountain…yup…very true…look it up.
Anyway, we stayed at the St. Regis which is basically right at the base of the mountain. It’s pretty much the only hotel that makes any sense for me (strangely it’s not teeming with modern luxury), but I think the real swanky digs are the house rentals, which go for astronomical amounts mind you, and the St. Regis ain’t exactly cheap. That being said, aspen certainly does have a shortage of accommodations with private hot tubs. Isn’t that a major ski slope goal? You, a girl, champagne, nip slips, etc…
Aspen is pretty small and they have these pedestrian mall type situations going in between the parallel roads headed away from the mountain. They were all a little too uniform for me. Maybe the whole town was a little uniform honestly. It’s like that one aspen image you have in your head from every movie, well that is the only image, there’s not much more to it. Not that there needs to be of course.
Ajax Tavern is the cool bar at the bottom of the main lift where everyone goes all day, and after they hit the slopes. It was quite the scene, and we honestly got some decent snacks there as well.
The Sundeck on the top of the mountain is a must do. Even if you just want to hang there (you can go up AND down the gondola, which my girl tested with vigor) it’s worth the trip.
Snowmass is pretty cool. Definitely better for the snowboarding! BUT, more importantly they have lodges right along the slopes that have…you guessed it, hot tubs! Oh my. Whatever will we do next time! And I think there will be a next time. Aspen and that entire area has a little bit of everything all wrapped inside a quaint little hidden town.
Notes to self:
-We stopped at Vail on the way to aspen. Had lunch at Los Amigos (which is like Vail’s Ajax tavern, at least location wise) and had a beer. Nice setting and they definitely make the “town” look alpine (perhaps a little too much), but the whole thing seemed a little too approachable for me. I want exclusive. I want to see how they roll. So on we went to Aspen.
-Element 47 was good but not great. Though we did see Daniel Tosh there which was cool. Dinner bread was awesome as shit, like puffy buns baked in one of those deep pans. The place was a little too fancy with an interior that just said old to me.
-The White House Tavern is the jam. The jam. Don’t sit upstairs.
-We bought some pot from the place next to grocery store. They were ridiculously nice, but we are lame, and we smoked it like nerds. Nerds.
St. Regis Aspen - Mar 2015
You gotta plan this shit. We got stuck in the “auxilary” building. Now they don’t call it that of course, but you have to cross a bridge over the road to get to that side so what the hell else are you going to say about it. So you walk into this beautiful Alpine lobby with this big bar and these huge chairs and this big fire place and they say, right this way sir, we are embarrassed with your presence and we hope you don’t mind if you would just hurry up and GET THE FUCK OUT of my beautiful room. Fine bitch! Just for that I’m gonna pee in your pool! Just kidding! I pee in all pools.
The room itself was fine. Nothing really too great. It sufficed. It made me sad for Aspen. You hear all this shit talk about opulence and the elite and money and etc. But at the end of the day, most of them who don’t live there are staying here, in a room you’ve probably stayed in a thousand times. Don’t get your hopes up unless you are in one of the suites on the top level, and if you’re in one of those it’s probably weak sauce for the likes of you too.
The bathrooms are good sized and have nice amenities. The fireplace in our room was nice, but it ain’t wood burning and ours wouldn’t really turn off, so nice turned into holy shit a few times. Pay per view was modern with 24 hour action. They had stocked mini bars and 24 hour room service. Our balcony was bullshit, looked at a tree.
They wouldn’t give us a late checkout even though my ass is gold…mother f.
The indoor spa pool is coed along with a number of outdoor hot tubs and a big pool (they are kind of up in everyone’s grill though, all the interior rooms face this area and the building ain’t huge, so you can be looking literally right at someone). Spa otherwise is not coed and each locker room houses the cold plunge pools and hot tub and steam room.
Notes
-I don’t know what else to say…what other choice do you have?